Bismi Llahir Rahmanir Rahim
by Naielah Ackbarali
Learning how to love from the best of creation…
Spend Time Together
The Prophet p.b.u.h. had a habit of visiting his wives after the ‘Asr prayer. He was the state leader, the commander in chief, the teacher, the father, the friend, and the neighbor for all of his community. Yet, he still made time for his spouses. Prioritize your marriage! Make intentional time for it, even if it is just thirty minutes a day. Every sweet second you spend with your spouse is worship for Allah’s sake.
The Prophet p.b.u.h. was playful with his spouses. He raced with Lady Aisha , he laughed with Lady Sawdah , and he showed his happiness with Lady Khadija . The Prophet said a smile in a Muslim’s face is charity. Give as much charity as you can by showing your spouse that you are happy to be with them! Every time you look at each other with joy, your love becomes stronger and your reward with Allah Most High increases.
Speak Kindly Together
The Prophet p.b.u.h. would call Lady Aisha by the name “Humayra” to compliment her beautiful skin. He also called her “A’ish” as a sweet nick- name. The Prophet said that Allah is Gentle and He loves gentleness. Don’t hold back the love! Warm each other’s hearts by speaking sweet, kind words. Allah Most High rewards for gentleness what is not granted for harshness and He does not reward anything else like it.
The Prophet p.b.u.h. ran to Lady Khadija in his most troubling moments. He depended on her to be a source of comfort for him during the difficulties he faced. During the Treaty of Hudaybiyya, Lady Umm Salama advised the Prophet with how to resolve an issue he had. Take turns listening to each other’s worries and concerns. Give the space to be heard and offer your help. Console your spouse with tender love.
Be Affectionate Together
The Prophet p.b.u.h. kissed his wives, even while he was fasting. He drank from the same spot of the cup that Lady Aisha drank from. He slept next to Lady Umm Salama under the same cover even though she was menstruating. He regularly made love to his spouses. Say ‘I love you’ through a soft, meaningful touch. Hold hands. Hug. Cuddle. Kiss. Embrace. Caress. Create intimacy. Be like a cozy garment for each other.
The Prophet p.b.u.h. prayed with his wives . They performed the spiritual retreat (‘itikaf) during Ramadan. His wives lived and ate simply so that they could give in charity. They followed the Prophet’s example and dedicated their time and effort for Islam. Encourage each other to do the good. Pray together. Fast together. Read Qur’an together. Volunteer together. Learn together. Live your marriage together for Allah’s sake.
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